


[PLACEHOLDER]

by AJtheDragon



Category: Harley Quinn (Cartoon 2019)
Genre: Conflict, F/F, How Do I Tag
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-09
Updated: 2020-06-16
Packaged: 2021-03-04 01:21:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,087
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24625405
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AJtheDragon/pseuds/AJtheDragon
Summary: Takes place after season 2 episode 10's.Harley is determined to tidy her mess's and is going to get Queen Fables Book back to do it. Even if she has to make a deal with the one man she despises more then anything.With her crew standing by her side, and the events at Themyscira glossed over, Harley would much prefer to keep Ivy out of the storm she's brewing for herself.
Relationships: Pamela Isley & Harleen Quinzel, Pamela Isley/Harleen Quinzel, Poison Ivy/Harley Quinn
Comments: 9
Kudos: 43





	1. Mista J

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer/Prentive Warning: As much as I want to, there is a high likely hood this story wont reach its conclusion. I have all the chapters set up but I never end up finishing them for on reason or another. So If you don't like story's that don't ever reach an ending I'm not blaming you for clicking off, that's why this little message is here.

_"What the,_ fuck _have you done Harls?_ ” Ivy hissed tightening her grip on Harleys upper arm. She couldn’t find it in herself to _care_ as Harley tugged against her, a whine straining against the blondes clenched teeth as she no doubt left a bruise on the girl's upper arm. If she had known _this_ is what she’d turn up to, she would have had Chuck to turn around. Fuck, she wouldn’t have even opened the _text_ , but noooo _Harley_ HAD to run into the Joker, had decided to throw him in a vat of acid to bring him back. Just like any _sane_ person would do to their abusive ex. 

Harley tugged again, but her arm was firmly locked in Ivy’s vice grip. “Iv’s, I'm tryin’ to fix my mess’s here. All I gotta do is release the Justice League and they’ll take care of the Parademons!” Harleys smile was strained, for as close as she was to Ivy at this moment, the sharp rage burning in the other women's green eyes, was not warming her blood as they once did weeks ago. 

Ivy, with her free hand, pinched the bridge of her nose, her nails leaving crescent moon indents as she snarled at the blonde. With a measured breath, she strained out though gritted teeth. “And... _why_ did you need the _Joker_ for _that_. Precisely?” 

Harleys smile widened just a bit “Queen of fables, she locked ‘em in ‘er book! If mista J can just tell me where it is, I can go grab it, let em out, and they’ll fix everythin’!” 

Something in Ivy’s heart twisted, and she tightened her grip, nails digging into muscle of Harleys arm. “And you're just going to leave the Joker roaming _free_. I can't believe you, I know you do some crazy things. But rebounding with the _Joker_? He tried to _kill you_ ” She realized to late, just, what she had said, as she watched something break behind the blue eyes of her friend. 

With a snarl, Harley twisted her arm out of Ivy’s grip, uncaring of the blood she left under the other girls nails as she moved back with a growl. “I aint fuckin’ the Joker, and all I was tryin’ to do, was ta fix my fucking mistakes for once! Without _you_ getting involved!” 

Ivy flinched. Harley was right in her face, eyes laser focused as they bored into hers as the blonde snarled at her. Grabbing the front of her top, she pushed the clown back as she practically screamed at the ex-psychiatrist “Harley! You summoned Parademons from hell to destroy Gotham.” She through her hand wide, displaying the multitude of decapitated parademons that littered the mall. “How _wasn’t_ I supposed to get involved!” 

Before Harley could retort, a slimy voice carried over the large space. “Er, Ladies. If you're done. I think I'm ready for my spot light. Harley, if you could be a dear and get me a martini, that would be, _lovely._ ” He sneered in a sing-song tone, sitting on the sofa as Bud and Lou guarded him, King Shark and Clayface not far behind him, ready to grab him when he tried to pull something. 

“ _I'm gonna fucking kill him..._ ” Ivy growled under her breath as she started stalking towards the sofa. 

“Red, no, we need ‘im” Harley pleaded, her hand barely coming to rest on the green girl's chest as she tried to push her back. 

Ivy looked down at the blonde, eyes swimming over her face before they hardened. Brushing the other girls hand away Ivy stepped around Harley, moving to be as far away from her as she could. “How _you_ need him, you mean.” 

Harley turned, Ivy’s name on the tip of her lips. But as she watched ivy marched into the shadows, she couldn’t bring herself to call out to the girl as her heart broke just a little more. With an unsteady breath Harley straitened up, before marching to meet the others. 

Bud and Lou came to her side immediately, rubbing up against her leg like oversized pups. Giving each a scritch behind the ears, she stared the joker down, his too wide smile still in place as he lazed, arms stretched, against the back of their sofa. His eyes flicked to the side, watching the woman in green settle in the shadows before looking back with a conniving, knowing, grin. “You're just letting her walk away then? Never thought I'd see the day Harley.” He drawled, with a grin. 

The next thing she knew, joker was on the ground, his cursing echoing round the barren space as his blood dripped off Harleys fist. The Joker himself was clutching his now split and broken nose as he writhed on the floor, and if Harley had bothered to look at the shadows, she would have meat widened green eyes watching her with a worried gaze. 

She was done with his shit. 

Kicking the joker onto his back, Harley brought her foot down against his neck. Pressing _just_ harder than she needed to as she revaled in his gasping. She ignored King Sharks and Claymans concerns as she dug her heel in just that little bit more, before snarling down at the snake of a man. “Here's how this is gonna work, _Puddin’"_ She spat, “Your gonna tell me, how to get queenies book back, and I ain’t gonna kill ya? Do ya like the sound o’ that, mista j?” 

“Harley, _Harley_.” He cooed, patting her ankle tenderly. “Your still so _cute_. If my memory serves me right, it would seem I killed little miss green over there, and all you gave in return was a little memory wipe. What makes you think you scare me now!” He barked, cackaling as his head loled back, his toothy smile splitting his face. “ _MISS GREEN!_ How was it being planted, I'm sure you felt right at home!” 

Removing her foot, Harley kicked him in the nuts with every ounce of strength she had, punting him a few feet across the tile floor. Ignoring her crews pained hiss, and especially the whimper that came from the shadows near Ivy, Harley stormed over to where the joker was trying to pull himself up. 

Dropping her full weight onto the waste of oxygen, Harley made sure to grind her hip into his, revaling in his curses as he tried to buck her off. Harley, not even bothering to filch, tighten her grip, keeping him pined as she grasped his collar and pulled him up. 

At one point in her life this would be how one of ‘ _their_ ’ nights would have started. But right now? She wants nothing more than to make him choke on his own stupid green bean that he calls a dick. “You lissin ‘ear mista J. I ain’t scared o’ ya. Not no more, and if you don’t start being more. _Cooperative._ ” She stressed, pulling his collar tighter. “You’s gonna find why I run this town.” 

“Ah ah ha.” his laugh was breathy and light, the one he only gave when he got a cruel kind of enjoyment from a situation. “Harley, your Brooklyn’s showing through. Maybe go have a cuppa, before you go into one of your little. _Fits_ ” Jokers let the word curl of his tongue. 

“You think im’ scared mista J?” She pitched, easing the pressure of his groin. “I aint scared o’ you, I just told ya that.” She sang, caressing the fabric of his dress shirt “I'm _PISSED!_ ” She roared, slamming him into the floor, tightening her grip until his collar was practically throttling him. “I’ll ask one more time mista J. _Where's the book_.” 

“Like I'd ever tell you Harley.” He coughed out, sneering at the blonde who still hovered above him. 

“ _Fine._ ” Harley snapped, pushing off from him. “You wanna play it that way mista J? Then I'll let ya in on the joke.” She hissed down at the useless sack she once called a man. “Shark! Clay! Put him in the wheel!” She barked to her crew, all trace of her accent slipping away. “and make sure he doesn’t get out...” She added with a wine, as they lifted up the crazed clown. 

“ah~ Don’t you ever learn Harley... I'm sure the queen of fables told you much the same. Never leave an enemy _alive._ ” He cackled, staring her down, blood spraying from his nose as he sorted. 

“Oh just-! Take him _away_ already!” Ivy stressed, walking back to light, Kite man hot on her heels. “ _Harley_ …” The red head sighed, reaching for her still bloodied hand. 

She hadn't even notice that it was still bleedin’, and now that she tried to move it the blonde was certain she had managed to dislocate a finger or two, how fun. Pulling her hand away, she turned to the green skinned woman, eyes narrowing at man following her like a puppy. “Just- _leave it Ivy_. Go back to your cushy house, and cuddle with- _him._ ” She choked, bobbing her head towards Kite man. “I’ll tidy my own shit for once. Heck, I'll go ‘ _rebound_ ’,” she snarled. “Like you suggested.” 

“ _Harley._ ” Ivy growled, threat clear in her tone. Eyes dashing to kite man in warning. 

“I mean, I can't tell you what to do!” Harley continued on, blowing over Ivy’s threat. “So, go! Do what you want! Cuz me? Im gonna clean up my mess.” With that, she stormed off, leaving a pool of blood, and an emotionally torn friend. 

Signing, chuck placed an arm over his fiancée's shoulders. “We’re staying here for a while, aren't we?” 

Looking up at her husband to be, Ivy gave him a sorry smile. “Yeah...” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really wanted to get this up before the next episode as it will probably derail my preset plans for this story since it starts going into basically headcannon territory (it just straight up does, what am I saying).  
> But I'm really quite proud of this, Harleys a little OOC but, I have my reasons ;) (also I really cant picture Harley without her iconic accent, I really cant)  
> Extra: Title will almost defiantly change (if I ever come up with a good one at least...) and I would really like some tag suggestions as I have no clue what to put. I'll go back and edit in some new ones if I think of them, but I really don't know what should apply here...


	2. 1 Step Forward, 2 Steps Back

2 days, and the joker still wasn’t talking. Harley sat there, stabbing at her Weetabix as she tried to think of... _something_ that could make him talk. She had threatened him, beaten him and, unfortunately, he was too mentally unstable to be manipulated. 

“Stressing while you're eating wont do you any good Harley.” King Shark called over his shoulder as he worked at the opposite end of the kitchen counter. “He’s not going anywhere, me and Clay made sure of that, so just enjoy your meal, ok?” His soft voice was melodic as he smiled at the blonde. 

“It's just- The longer he spends in here, is more time for _Phyco_ to burn Gotham to the ground!” She screeched, hands tossed wide as she flung milk and fragments of her meal across the kitchen. 

“I say...” Clayface mumbled, brushing soggy grains off his chest, as he strode in. 

“Well, I _could_ try and threaten him again?” Shark suggested, turning to her with his kind eyes and soft smile. “I AM half shark after all.” He said, pulling his lips back in an attempt of a snarl, revealing rows of razor teeth. 

“We tried that already...” Clayface pitied, pulling his head out the fridge. “He just laughed at you...” 

“ _Yeah..._ that wasn’t very nice.” King Shark bemoaned, wagging his finger ( _fin?_ ) at Clayface, as if he was the clown himself. 

“Well, _I_ say you should ask Ivy. One douse of her pheromones, and he’ll be no better than carmen cucumber left ina compost bin, with the rotten tomato an’ shit.” Frank snorted, crossing his ‘arms’ from the dark corner he’d been shoved, and glued, into by Harley for a similar comment the previous day. 

“I already said, I _aint_ getting Red involved! This is my shit, not ‘er’s!” Harley barked, slamming her hands on the table, spilling a good portion of her milk. 

“I can still ‘Play the _part~~!_ ’ Clay face sung, spinning his form until he was the splitting visage of the brooding bat. “Of his _VILEST FOE_ ~, Sneak into his room, and _whisper_ sweet torture of what could have been between us! OH WHY JOKER!” Clay mourned with a dramatic flair, turning away from the group. “It could have been a love story for the ages, but you went and _threw it AWAY!_ ” Clay wept. 

“No.” Harley deadpanned, shutting it down the second clay face took a breath, seeing Batman openly weep was just... _creepy_ “Even if bats were interested in fucking anything other than the ratty bats he takes after, Joker would never go for it.” She sighed, going back to stirring what was left of her one o’clock breakfast. 

“You’ll figure something out Harley...” Shark comforted, patting her bruised hand as he placed the plate he’d been preparing in front of her. 

“What... even is this...?” Harley hazered, poking the white gelatinous lump placed on the plate, next to two slices of bread. 

“It's oatmeal, with a dash of salt. The bread is the last of that wholemeal from last week... _and_ I added just a dash of ground walnuts to the oats, just like you asked.” Shark described, baring his teeth in an evil grin. 

Harleys grin was maniacal, as was her laugh, as she pulled the plate close. “ _Yes!_ Thanks Shark, I love you!” 

“Well someone's hyper.” Ivy commented, as she entered the kitchen, impassive to the conversation around her. 

Turning her glare to her browning milk, Harley downed the remainder of it before reaching for the plate. “Thanks Sharkie, I'll see what I can do with dis’.” 

As she reached for the glass of water King had placed down, along with the meal, soft green fingers covered the mouth of the cup, pulling it out of reach of the blonde. “Harley....” Ivy sighed, the two separated by the breakfast bar, as they watched one another. “Harls, just.... listen?” Ivy implored, leaning over the table to be eye level with her friend. “This...” vaguely her hand waved in the direction of the generator, where the Joker was contained. “It... It just isn't working Harls...” Her eyes were watching the blues of her friends pleadingly. 

Harley huffed, bringing her hand up to scratch at the 4 long gashes that still ran along her bicep, witch she’d had to _once again_ disinfect no thanks to Lou. “It's been two days Red. I’ll get ‘im talkin’.” She promised, mostly to herself, a growl reverberating in her throat as she stared the eco terrorist down. 

“I-” She started, before dropping her head with a sigh. “Harls... I'm just worried fo-” 

“Hey hon.” Chuck interrupted, peppering a kiss to the back of Ivys head, before marching off to the fridge. Looking up, Ivy watched Kite man march off with a glare, missing Harleys crest fallen look before she pushed away from the table. 

“I aint needin’ ya pitty Red.” Harley snapped, grabbing the plate. “I can fend for ma’ self.” She hissed, snatching the glass out from Ivy’s weakened grip. 

“Harls! I didn’t mean-!” Ivy gasped, chasing the fleeing blond to the base of the stairs, before throwing up her hands when it was clear the blonde wanted to hear nothing the she had to say. “ _Fine!_ ” She barked up to Harley as she let her storm away. 

Harley hissed to herself, she wasn’t gonna let Ivy get involved. Even if she had to kick the green woman and her paper bag of a husband out. Slowing down her steps, Harley straightened out her fingers, at least as best she could while holding a glass. Snatching it out from under Ivy's grip with her bad hand had not been one of her wiser ideas. But thinking about her recent actions, it was still leagues better, and then some. 

Throwing her head back, Harley let out a groan, watching the decrepit ceiling as she made her way to the ‘cell’. Joker was giving nothing away, and everything she had tried all ended in the same result. Him getting shocked, and Harley being no closer to her goal, and being extremely pissed off to boot. 

If it wasn’t for Ivy’s vines reinforcing the place, Harley was sure she woulda brought the place down with the amount of walls she's smashed in at this point. 

“Ah... Harley... Did you have a nice morning?” He joked through heavy breaths, with an even voice. If it wasn't for his panting, he would have been a symbol of calm. 

Pulling her head down, Harley watched the dishevelled man before her, from the safety of the door way. His dress shirt was stained a heavy crimson, as were his trousers. His green hair was in disarray, thrown every which way, wisps of it sticking to his skin. His once pristine white skin was blotched with blooming bruises, the worst being on his cheek from where shed clocked him for a comment, he’d made about Ivy, framed by the dried blood, that would occasionally leak from his crocked nose. This, was not the man she once knew. The one she once loved. Harley knew now, more than she ever did, that he _never_ loved her, she was a means to an end. The punchline for his joke. 

And she still was. 

Putting the plate down on the small table next to the wheel, Harley moved to lean against the table on the far wall, picking up the controller as she watched him run. He watched her as one might watch a hussy as they fooled themselves on the dance floor. In mocking and disgust. “Are ya gonna eat? Next meal aint for five hours.” 

He snorted, grabbing the plate without looking away from Harley. “You didn’t answer my question ‘ _Harls_ ’.” 

“An’ you haven't answered mine ‘ _puddin_ ’.” 

“I’ll answer your question when you finally become a threat to my being, how's that?” He snarked, bring a spoonful of oats to his lips. 

Harley couldn’t help the pleased smirk as she watched the man. “You seem ta like forgettin’, I brought your tower down, I ruined your reputation, _me_.” She smirked, jabbing herself victoriously in the chest with her thumb. 

His smile dropped just a fraction as he lower the spoon. “We both know that was little greens doing.” He snarled. “Next time I'll make sure to coat the harpoon in _weed repellent_.” 

“ _watch it..._ ” Harley threatened, brandishing the controller in his direction. 

“You and that _Bindweed_ , its _disgusting_.” he gagged, wolfing down the entire spoonful. 

Harley couldn’t stop her cackling as the Joker started gagging for real, doubling over as he spat out the clump of oats. 

“ _Bitch._ ” He gasped, glare boring into the hysterical blonde “You put _walnuts_ in this?!?” He screeched, rising to his full height, wobbling as the momentum of the wheel tried to knock him over. “You _Know_ I HATE walnuts!” He roared slamming the plate back down onto the table, sending the bread flying. 

“ _yeah_ …" Haley wheezed between breaths, “Yeah... _I do_.” 

“Fuck you Quin _zel_.” 

“Aw~… I love you too _Puddin_.” She sung between gasps. 

The Joker glared at her as he slowly started meandering again. “I'm not getting anything else, am I?” 

“ _nope._ ” Harley teased, popping her ‘p’. 

Picking the plate back up, which now had a considerably less oats. Joker started to eat small Spoonfuls, reaching with bite. “I honestly despise you, Quinn.” 

“Believe me, the sentiment is shared.” 

They stayed in relative silence as the Joker finished off his meal, the only sound being his quite gagging. Harley staying off to the side as she watched him. Her head swimming over the shit storm that has been the last 72 hours.   
Her mind circled back to Ivy's words from earlier, and in all truth. It wasn’t working. She knew how to punch and curse. She could pick apart a person's phycology from 20 feet. But she couldn’t beat the Joker. Not back then, and not when it mattered now. He always had control. 

Throwing the plate, without concern, back to where he grabbed it. The Joker downed his drink, before tossing, that also, down onto the rest of the dishes. The two watched each other, neither commenting or sneering, for a pulse, before the Joker snorted, looking away to return to his jog. 

She watched him, time feeling heavy as the lights flickered around her. They were in her home ground, and she couldn’t win. Lolling her head forward, she watched her feet kick at lose rubble. 

“what do you want...?” She didn’t even realise she had said it, voice quite to her own ears as she studied the cracked cement. 

The Jokers pace slowed, his low, questioning hum reverberating through the room, as he glanced at her. 

“I said...” The air seemed to thrum around her, strength coming back to her voice as she met the Jokers eyes. “ _What do you want?_ ” 

His returning grin was wide. “Why, _Harley_ … Why would I want anything?” 

“Cuz I know ya mista J.” She mulled, strolling closer to the hamster wheel. “You’s always wantin’ somethin’.” 

“That does sound like me, doesn't it?” He snarked, looking away in thought. 

“I run this joint mista J. Tell me where Queenie keeps her book, and... I’ll give ya anything ya want.” 

“You play such a big game Harley, and yet... _your still scare of me_. You haven't changed.” He droned, frowning at the glaring blonde. “You haven't changed since the first time we met. Have you, _Harleen_?” 

“I've changed a plenty mista J, it anit you I'm scared of no more.” She whispered, striding up to his side with crossed arms. “I’ll ask again. What da’ ya want mista J?” 

He rose and ugly green brow at her challenge. “And if I asked for miss Green or any of your jolly ranchers?” 

“Anythin’ but them, anythin’ but _her_.” She breathed, staring down the beast. 

“You drive a hard bargain Harley,” His grin pulled wide, as his eyes piercing through her. “I’d have to think on it.” 

“Not this time mista J.” She snarled, marching as closer to the wheel as she could, to get right in his face. “This deal is a’ now or never. You tell me how to get the Justice League back, and I'll make a deal with ya.” She hissed. 

His laugh was soft, as he shook his head. “You are _something_ Quinn. You always were.” As nice as the comment was, Harley could hear the undercurrent of spite held in the sentence. Bringing his head up, he looked her right in the eyes, studying her, before commanding. “I want out, and I want her book. That bitch stole all my cash and my ammo stash when she up and split. Get me that, I'll tell ya were she is.” 

Harley glance at the controller, before glaring at him. “How’d I know _you_ aint plain’ to ‘up and split’. 

“Because...” He drawled, like it was the most obvious thing. “I know you’ll get me what that bitch stole, you were always good for that.” His smile brightened as something sparked I his brain, “I know! How's this to sweeten the pot? You agree, and I promise, _pinkie_ proper contract, kinda promise, not to hurt your crew.” He offered, his grin turning downright menacing, “And I won't ever lay a hand on your little sunflower. How's that?” 

Harley stepped back, eyes not leaving the Joker, as she thought. Return the justice league to Gotham, at the cost of also returning the Joker. While also giving him, possibly, one of the most powerful magical artefacts there was. But he wouldn’t hurt her crew. Or Ivy. 

Harley look to the far corner, over a dozen broken bats lay in ruin from the last two day in this room alone. Crossing room in two strides, she grabbed the most intact one she could find. A large split running down the head, from being thrown into a wall. Turning back, she marched up to the now stationary Joker. 

“Kite man's off limits too, _say it._ ” 

“I won't touch your men, your ‘ _buddy_ ’, or her bed bug. Happy?” 

“No, but that doesn’t matter.” She muttered, handing over the controller as she watched him with sharp eyes. “I get everyone out, you leave. Break the restraints, or just disappear, I don’t care. If ya let on that I dis this, deals off.” 

“Always so _conniving_.” He purred, stroking the edge of the box, his finger tracing the rim of the button. Pressing it, his restraints released with a hiss, the sound causing a smile to split his face. “Such a good girl.” he hummed, pocketing the box as he pulled the restrains closed, but not locked. 

“We had a deal Mista J...” Harley threatened, bringing her bat to the front. 

“Of course my sweet,” He teased, looking down on the tense girl and spoke. 

“ _She's at the fairground off Queens pier_.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey... So anyone else forget Queen of Fables was dead? Just me? Because... opps.  
> Ye chapter 2! Not sure how long Chap 3 will take since, what was originally just one chapter grew a mind of its own its getting a *little* longer than what I was planning. So the next one might actually be quite a wait unless I have a big burst of productivity.


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